The skills of ministering to men is often misunderstood because we are working with a group of individuals that by virtue of their life are wrapped up in dozens of things at one time, generally running from one place to another, dealing with the stress of family responsibility, work, and taking care of a home.
The average church today is running between 100 and 200 people, and these are considered small to medium churches. As a Minister to Men it is important to understand that we cannot keep up with the Mega churches, nor should we want to. The men of your church have chosen your church for a reason, many like the small intimacy of the church, the friendships they develop, others attend small to medium churches due to living in small towns, or small local communities. Whatever reason they chose to attend your church you have a unique opportunity to minster to them that big churches miss out on.
As a Minister to Men in three small to medium size churches, I have found it critical to choose two or three things at the most that we can do well, and focus the men on these. I believe that there are 3 things that we need to do, to be effect in ministering to men in small to medium size churches. In my churches we focus on fellowship, friendships, and fatherhood. If I can strengthen the men I minister to in these three areas I will have accomplished a great deal.
Let me explain my reasoning for these three points (challenges) in ministering to men:
First: Fellowship… Helping the men to develop a personal time of fellowship with Christ, through their devotions, and Bible Study. We do this through various challenges (such as Champion Program, Men’s Fraternity, and etc.) as well as hosting Bible Studies at the church for the men to attend. Second: Friendship… Helping me to strengthen their relationship’s with their Christian brothers within the church is essentials to their Christian walk. Spending time with Godly men, learning, and maturing with them helps them grow. Third: Fatherhood… Helping them to learn to be the Godly father’s (dad) they should be in their family is a key point of the Christian walk. Any man can be a Biological father, but it takes a REAL MAN to be Father/Daddy. This is a foundational point of not only the family, but the church.
As a Minister to Men for over the past 8 years, I also believe that it is important for you personally as Minister to Men to have five foundation principles. Know where your Men’s Ministry in the local church is heading, and how you plan to get there. Someone once asked me when I sleep, because it seems like my mind is always going. It’s going at this pace because I believe that we have something to accomplish over the next year with our men. And it is my obligation as men’s leader to set the vision, pace, and agenda for the men.
Ministering to Men in your church will only go as far as you plan to go! It is always important to First: Have a clear vision/direction of what you believe God wants you to accomplish. It is essential that you know what the vision or direction you are going, without it you will get side track and off on to many projects and miss the opportunity too something very well. The one thing that I need to caution Men’s Leaders about in the small and medium church is don’t try do everything do what you can and do it very good. If you have an older group of men, the Saturday breakfast is great idea, if you have a younger group of men they need to have an activity that requires action. If you have both, looks for a balance that will impact your men.
Second; Have a clear understanding of what you’re teaching the men, and what they need to learn: I think that it is essential to find good solid material to teach your men, and to challenge them to learn from. There are several great teaching tools available for Ministering to Men,
Third: Have a personal Mentor… Have a personal Mentor and accountability partner to keep you grounded and focused. I encourage our men to develop mentorship roles with other men, and continue to develop the relationship as the mentored individual moves on to mentor. In my mind it works sort of like the father/son relationship. Father is the father to his son, but he is also the son to his father. The same applies a Mentor is the mentor to mentored, but he is also the mentored to the mentor. This is referred to as discipleship, and believe me it is the foundation of your church.
Fourth: Have a good relationship with your pastor: I’m convinced that it is essential that as a Minister to Men you have a good relationship with your pastor that he is included in all the decisions that are being made by the Men’s Ministry. It is essential that you show respect to the pastor, because you set the tone for what your men will do.
Fifth: Have a clear and personal testimony: Have a heart to share your faith with the men whom you come into contact with. Develop the skills to bring a man to Christ, if you don’t know these skills ask you pastor to help you, or your need to check out the resources online.
Friends, as you develop your skills to as a Minister to Men, remember you have two people to impress and represent. (1) The Lord Himself, and (2) the men of your church.